


Friends Aren't For Lonely People

by LilDoodleCat



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Janti - Freeform, Kissing, Loneliness, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-11-07 23:22:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17970011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilDoodleCat/pseuds/LilDoodleCat
Summary: Just because your last friend dumps you over text like a brand new ex doesn't mean nobody cares.





	Friends Aren't For Lonely People

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote the first half of this when I hit a really rough patch a while back, so if the bit after the break seems disjointed, off, or anything of the sort relative to the beginning, that's why.
> 
> Edit Sep. 3, 2019: changed the title and the summary because I didn't like the old ones :P  
> Old title in case you were trying to find this fic - Done and Gone

Jack pressed down on the pedal, going well over the legal limit in his desperation to get home. He promised his friend he’d finally have the time to do something with him today, but everything had become so overwhelming and he hadn’t even had time for himself. His alarm failed to go off this morning and he slept in, nearly missing the job interview he so desperately needed to get through with good standing. Then his housemate had insisted he go out and buy groceries and various items they needed for the apartment. He knew they’d probably throw some sort of hissy fit and break something if he didn’t, so—however reluctantly—he’d gone out and spent an extra few hours complying to that bitch’s “request”.

He was nearly to the turn-off that would take him to his apartment complex when a cop’s red and blue lights began flashing close behind him. The knot of anxiety that had been sitting in his stomach jumped to his throat and choked him. He slowed and pulled over on the side of the road. He put his car into park and rested his forehead against the steering wheel as he waited for the officer to come and knock on his window. A moment passed, and Jack realized just how hard and quick his breaths were. He furrowed his brow and focused on his breathing, slowing it carefully as he regained control of it. By the time the officer did knock on his window he’d calmed somewhat, still swimming in anxiety but breathing easier.

Jack jammed his finger onto the button immediately, not wanting to irritate the woman with the badge and authority to arrest him. The small, yet ever so loud rev of the car window descending was second only to the pounding of his heart. The conversation went about as standard as he expected. She asked him if he realized how fast he was going and he’d mumbled a soft ‘yes’, to which followed him receiving a ticket he’d have to go and resolve in court later. Another item on his ever-growing list of tasks and responsibilities that just felt so out of his control. Documents were passed back and forth and the woman thanked him for his cooperation. Jack nodded, feeling his phone buzz and unshed tears stinging the corners of his eyes. He mumbled for her to have a good night, waiting as she wished him the same and retreated to her car.

Once she’d departed, he shifted the car out of park and pressed much lighter on the gas pedal. His car now puttered along lightly, just under the speed limit and so much slower than he felt he should be moving. The sad coughing of his exhaust pipe and slow rotation of his wheels only proved to worsen his mood. It took him only five minutes to reach the underground parking for his building, then another two or so to reach his designated spot, and finally six more to reach his door. All around it was maybe only fifteen minutes, but cliche as it was, it felt so much longer to the man. Each moment dragged and stabbed at his ankles to remind him that he was taking too long, that he was too slow, that he was _too late_.

His key slid easily into the lock, clicking it open with a sharp turn from him. A harsh collision with his shoulder had the door open and he lugged his purchases past it, kicking it shut once he deemed himself far enough inside. He’d lock it later. The groceries that needed refrigeration or freezing were haphazardly stuffed in their respective places while everything else was simply thrown onto the counter and left. Something he knew prissy shitface would surely whine about later. Despite his knowing prediction he left his mess behind and locked himself in his room.

Jack didn’t even bother to turn on the lights as he dropped down on the edge of his bed, quickly yanking his phone out of his pocket and unlocking it before immediately pulling down the notification bar. He ignored the various social media pings and tapped hurriedly on the one set of texts he had received just a bit earlier.

**Kaden**  
look man, i’m gonna have to bail on ya  
nothing against you personally but  
you’re always busy and i’ve been waiting literally all day for you  
_8:22 pm_

Jack panicked, his already frantic heartbeat shooting up dangerously as he scrambled to reply.

**Jack**  
No wait!!  
I’m finally home, dude, please  
_8:43 pm_

His teeth dug ruthlessly into his bottom lip, not quite hard enough to draw blood but still incredibly painful; grounding.

**Kaden**  
i waited  
you were too busy  
always are  
i can’t be friends with a fucking ghost Jack  
_8:45 pm_

Teeth broke skin and he could taste blood. Jack felt so incredibly guilty in that moment. It hurt because he _knew_ that this was his fault. He really was busy today, he’d had so much to do, but many other days he’d flaked on his friend because he just couldn’t find the motivation to leave his bed, let alone leave the house and socialize. Each and every one of those times he’d made some excuse about being busy, not wanting to come off as avoiding his friend’s company.

**Jack**  
Give me a chance to explain!  
I had a job interview today, I couldn’t reschedule and I need this job as soon as possible  
I had to get groceries for my bitch flatmate after that  
Then on the way home I got pulled over for speeding  
All of this shit was out of my control  
_8:46 pm_

He waited, still gnawing on his bleeding lip as the irony taste of it bathed his tongue.

**Kaden**  
Jack  
you think i haven’t caught on to your excuses  
well guess fucking what  
i’m sick and tired of waiting for you all the time  
you’re a shitty friend, Sean  
_8:50_

Tears welled and spilled from Jack’s eyes, trickling down his cheeks and dripping from his chin.

**Jack**  
I know  
I’m sorry, it’s my fault.  
_8:50_

**Kaden**  
chuck my number and don’t talk to me again  
i’ll find better friends somewhere else  
_8:56_

Jack dropped the phone on his bed. Fingers lifted to touch his wet cheeks and his teeth finally release his lip, allowing him to let out a small, choked cry. He pulled his knees up to his chest and buried his face in them, sobbing heavily as his body trembled. He’d just thrown his last friendship out the window. He was alone.

  


___________

 

Several minutes passed, the air ringing only with his voice as he lamented. A beat more, and he felt arms around him. He stiffened, raising his pounding head to gaze with bleary vision at the figure in front of him. Jack suddenly felt a light breath against his ear, words he couldn’t hear being whispered ever so softly. His brain wasn’t quite registering what was happening around him, and he blinked as all his previous thoughts blanked. He focused intently, trying to understand the soft murmurs of a familiar voice.

A moment, and the whispers began to sound like words. 

“You're okay.”

“I'm here."

“It's alright."

His vision finally started to clear, and he noted lightly that their legs were floating in just above his bed. Jack wanted to speak, to acknowledge the comforting figure. So he tried. He tried and tried, only able to produce a soft, choked gasp from his parted lips. Again he tried. Again and again. Again. Finally, a rasping voice greets the ears present.

“Anti…?”

The man’s arms tightened around him, his words halting as he buried his nose in the crook of Jack’s neck. Jack brought his arms up hesitantly, hovering them just away from Anti’s sides.

“Why did you bother to show up?” Jack whispered, voice hoarse and strained. 

Anti frowned, pulling back. “I… You were crying and I—fuck.”

“Thought so. I’m not worth the time, you know?” Jack smiled, broken.

“No!” Anti’s interjection startled Jack into a flinch. He quieted and spoke again, “No, Jack, you are worth every bit I just…” 

“You just what, Anti? You just felt sorry for me? You just—”

Anti threw a hand over Jack’s mouth, muffling him. “It’s not that. Stop jumping to conclusions.”

Jack quieted, waiting for Anti to remove his hand. He did.

“Then why? Tell me, Anti.”

“Because I… I-I care. I care about you Seán. I care. I care so fucking much and for the life of me I can’t figure out _why_.”

Jack sniffled slightly, breath shaking and broken. He parted his lips as if to speak. Instead, a whine found its way in the back of his throat, and his response came without words in that he finally rested his hovering fingers on the small of Anti’s back. He pulled his double closer so that he rested his weight on the bed, then moved to rest his face at the juncture between Anti’s neck and shoulder. Anti followed soon after and they held their embrace in silence. As time ticked by, Jack’s tears dried and his throat ached.

A bit later, when their breathing had calmed to slow and had matched, Anti pulled back to look Jack in the eyes. The area around them was puffy, strands of slightly matted hair hung just over them, and his wonderful blue eyes themselves were slightly bloodshot. He huffed, reaching to push Jack’s hair away from his eyes. 

“What am I gonna do with you?” Anti murmured, moving forward until their noses were almost touching.

Jack’s eyelids fluttered briefly, drooping until his eyes resembled half-moons. Things seemed to sway as vision swam, awkward jerking as the tips of their noses brushed and they seemed to contemplate their next actions. Anti was the one to finally close the gap, closing his eyes and tilting his head ever so slightly as he hesitantly locked lips with Jack. He almost expected the boy to pull away, to reject something so intimate and next-level to their impromptu hugging session. Yet, and yet, after a moment of simply holding the contact, Jack kissed back—if lightly and equally hesitant.

It was slow, gentle, soft. Jack threaded his fingers through Anti’s hair and added a bit more pressure, but the action never escalated further. Everything was so calm. Safe. And after a bit they separated just slightly, lips still brushing as they breathed. This soft, comfortable kissing repeated once more, and then again just in case, before they parted enough to gaze into one another’s eyes.

“You’re not alone, Seán.” Anti finally breathes, running a thumb over the corner of Jack’s lips as they tugged up ever so slightly; a light smile that left a flutter in his chest.

They laid down after that, embracing one another beneath the covers. Jack tucked his face against Anti’s chest, a fistful of the man’s shirt in one hand and the other interlaced with the hand of the man whose chest he’d made his pillow. The silence enveloped them completely, and for at least this moment, everything could be forgotten, and they could rest.

**Author's Note:**

> [My Tumblr](https://lildoodlecat.tumblr.com/) if you care to check it out.  
> I take small fic-esc writing requests if that interests you? Info's in my bio over there.


End file.
